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My Hero; My Hope



My life has always  been like a wild goose chase. Nothing is ever enough so I chase the whirlwind and the tornadoes. Hoping to catch them before disaster strikes and throws my house down to nothingness. 

Few things were ever permanent for me. I was always deathly afraid to have good things because I’m almost certain they’ll expire before I can blink!

I never could jump up for joy even when I was happy because I was always dashing through the chapters of my life like the “white rabbit in the coat in Alice in wonderland .”

I was always in a rush to see how the book ends! The endings were always the same; defeated and trampled on by the raging demons in my head! 

I inhaled a sharp deep breath from the depth of my stomach. my shoulders fell back in a relaxed state as the tension melted away. 

For the first time I feel free and ready for a different well deserved prize ending!

Disney happy endings were meant for fairytales and that is the only place where they should only belong! 

I realize now that I need to be writing my own happy endings instead of sprinting  through the same book that was written by someone else ; I’d read over and over knowing it’s a biased ending to my story; but continued to read through again and again! 

I finally came to accept that I was the knight in shining armor I was always waiting for!

I should have been staring at the mirror all along to find the hero within  instead of hoping to find my white night in a circus of clowns in disguise! 

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